Communication is such an important tool in relationships, but what’s even more important is listening to whats being communicated to us.
That can be really hard to remember and do. We’re usually trying to think of how to reply to our spouse instead of just listening. I know for me that’s true. I feel like I have to have an answer for his feelings or like I have to defend my position. Our minds just don’t stop sometimes. We naturally try to be fixers and helpers.
If we’re always thinking of a reply, how can we really listen and process what’s being said to us?
The Four Seasons of Marriage by Gary Chapman has some excellent advice on this very topic. He talks about really trying to stop ourselves from thinking of a reply and just listen to our spouse and what they are trying to say to us. He encourages us to hear the heart of our spouse and listen to what’s going on with them, especially during disagreements because we tend to get more emotional during those.
We want to be a safe place for our man and his feelings. I know most of us want to know the heart of our husband, but if we never truly listen to him then we never will. It will take some self-control and some practice, but I think it will be worth it to really hear him out.
I encourage you, start today, listening with the intent to hear and not with the intent to reply.
Father, words are so important, but if we don’t hear them they don’t do us any good. Help us to truly listen to our husband when he speaks. Listening is just as important as speaking. Open our ears to hear and our eyes to see his heart. Help him articulate how he feels without being hindered by our reply. We want to be a safe place for our man. We want to hear and know his heart. Give us strength to just listen and hear him out. In Jesus’ name, Amen.